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Landlord won't fix the thermostat!!!
11.18.05 (7:05 pm)   [edit]
Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! !




4 Comments
 
Break out the Champale
11.11.05 (12:12 pm)   [edit]
One of the greatest television anomalies of our time has been corrected...

7th Heaven has been cancelled!!!

May the celebrations begin.

The WB announced that it was not renewing the show that brought us those whacky, flaky and self-righteous Camdens and the long-suffering people forced to live with them. Short of putting Brenda Hampton (Creator/Talentless hag) into a drug-induced coma, the network has done the best thing for the show. No more suffering on Monday nights at 8pm ET until the real shows come on (on other networks).

WB, BRAVO!!!

The cancelling of 7th Heaven is the television equivalent of the dot.com bubble of the 90's bursting. The show was grossly over-valued and over-rated. The cast was overpaid and the writing,... well, overwritten. This glorified unfunny afterschool special soap opera farce met its artistic demise seasons ago but was kept on as the WB flagship because, well, I don't frickin' know. It's not like they didn't have other quality programming. Everwood comes to mind. This is the same network that cancelled Jack & Bobby, a critical darling with loads of potential, because G-d-forbid Christine Lahti be as preachy as Rev. Camden - that intellectual elitist whore! One network cannot sustain two swelled heads.
1 Comments
 
Tease me once, shame on you...
11.08.05 (2:12 pm)   [edit]
...tease me twice, I may just have to kill you.

I hate it when people lead you on and leave you hanging. I'm not talking about a ginormous case of blue balls. I'm talking about sending mixed signals and blatant signals of interest and then stating that things can't go any further and then continuing on your merry flirty way. Continuing to be a tease even after it's been established that there is interest on the other side is just plain wrong! In fact, it's UNETHICAL!! What is good, clean fun for you, is torture for me.

If you have no real intentions, stop the flirting and the touchy-feely behaviour. Someone is going to get hurt, namely me. If I get hurt, I may just have to inflict some pain of my own.

That is all.
5 Comments
 
Quotes of the Week
11.04.05 (11:08 am)   [edit]
Not to worry, I have no intention of repeating anything some important person or celebrity said at some highly publicized event this week. There will be no mention of Paul Martin or 50 Cent or Paris Hilton or Oprah. Instead I present to you things said by me or to me by my friends and associates over the past week, that had me wetting myself a wee bit. Hee.

On shaving in Canada:

"I tend to wait until things get a little out of hand before shaving them ... with the weather as it is now, so fricken cold, it's hairy-pits for now."


Selective amnesia:

"Well, I have already seen you naked... or was I *dreaming*? Must've been the meds!"


People deal with pain differently:

"How nice with the back-stroking and hand-holding, though. I don't know how you took it. When I feel bad, I want people to leave me the fuck alone and not touch me!"


Priapism:

"We had that pelican feeling right through october - where ever we turned we had an enormous bill infront of us...(nicked that from Blackadder)."


On "Perfect" people:

"Dont put yourself down - sometimes 'so far evolved' can mean they can be forgetful about what it's like to be human."


It's no big deal:

"Naaah, you'll be fine. If you'd humped him in the alley behind the pub THEN you'd have been in big trouble!"


Workplace accident:

"Something seemingly so minor as a little fall can really ruin one's day! ... And, let me ask the most American of questions... can you SUE for MILLIONS?!?!?"

The Beer snob:

"I wish I were more open minded, but I'd never come here again if I found that you were drinking the wrong beer. I hope it's not Pabst or Schmitt, or Coors or Corona."

Y'all have a blessed weekend.
4 Comments
 
Winter, Spring, Summer orFall...
11.01.05 (4:50 pm)   [edit]
I'm soliciting your opinions. How do you feel about large age-gaps between significant others?

For a long time I subscribed to the "Half plus Seven" rule of age-appropriate dating. What's the "Half plus Seven" rule? Well, it states that you shouldn't date anyone younger than half your age plus seven years, or conversely, you shouldn't date anyone that is older than the double of your age minus seven years. Confused? Let's use actual numbers.

A woman who is 25 should not date someone that is younger than 12.5 + 7 = 19.5 years, according to the rule. Conversely, she should not date someone that is older than 2 x (25 - 7) = 36 years old.

This rule allows adjustments for the diminishing importance of age-gaps as individuals get older. Dating a 31 year-old when you're 19 seems like a bigger age-gap than when you're 29 dating a 41 year-old. In fact for a 41 year old, 29 is withing the "Half plus Seven" range but for a 31 year-old 19 isn't.

Also, if I'm 29 and I wished to date someone who is currently 56, I just need to wait a measely 12 years before I'm within range. Wonderful, eh? Oh, wait, did I lose ya?

Ok, here's how I got that. Let

The Gap = x - a = 56 - 29 = 27 years

So for someone who is x years old, the minimum age according to the HPS rule is a = x/2 + 7.

The gap is unchanging, provided neither one of us dies which would kind of make this all meaningless, but anyhoo...

So the gap is x - a = x - (x/2 + 7) = x/2 - 7

So the age at which the gap of 27 will be within HPS range is found be setting
27 = x/2 - 7, which yields an age of 68 (HOLY CRAP!!!). Urm, yeah, so then

a = 68 - 27 = 41.

So 12 long years.

Anyway, what do you all think of this nonsense?
5 Comments
 



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