Here are the first 25 of the 51. I will post the rest tomorrow so your head doesn't explode from too much useless information.
1. What's your full name?
Like my friend told her husband..."Not tonight."
2. Were you named after anyone?
I was named after a prostitute in a Russian film
3. Do you wish on stars?
Yes, occasionally I wish on Colin "F--king" Farrell.
4. Which finger is your favorite?
My pinky. I like sticking it on the side of my lip and saying, "One mimimimillion dollars."
5. When did you last cry?
If it's morning now, last night. If it's night now, probably five minutes ago. I cry at the slightest hint of emotion but I'm not depressed. I just feel too much. My cup runneth over because like my bladder it's too small.
6. Who do you admire?
My Mom. She worked two jobs and still helped us with our homework and put us to bed at night, then she went back to school to get her Masters when we were grown and started her own business. She was completely devoted to my Dad to the very end. She's seen many tragic things but she's never bitter. She still takes pleasure in the smallest of things. Her heart knows no bounds.
7. What is the #1 priority in your life?
It's a tie: Zit control (sad but true) and Family.
8. Your favorite lunch meal?
Breaded Catfish and Wild Rice with Asparagus in hollandaise sauce and a desert of nekkid Rick Warden dripping in dark chocolate (a.k.a. Nat).
9. Any bad habits?
Television, internet, Dulce de Leche ice cream, getting up late, online bidding, naked Rick Warden jokes, chocolate,....
10. What store would you never be caught dead in?
Sorry, drawing a blank here.
11. If you were another person, would you be friends with you?
Yes, I'd make me look good by comparison. I'd be my own D.U.F.F - designated ugly fat friend.
12. Are you a daredevil?
No. Somedays I don't even get out of bed for fear I may trip over something and die. I don't like taking risks.
13. Do looks matter?
Hell yes! To me, I like a good sense of humor before a nice pert ass, but I'm not blind. Mind you, the looks that matter to me may not be in line with the rest of world's view of beauty. I like soft bellies as much as rock-hard abs. I don't like overly muscular men or metrosexual men who spend more money on skin and hair products than I do.
14. What's your favorite piece of clothing?
My red mary-janes. They make me so very happy. I feel like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.
15. When was the last time you punched someone?
Christmas Day. My family and I were playing pictionary and I punched my brother when he mistakingly called my drawing of Frosty the Snow Man a Snow Dildo.
16. Are you trendy?
Not really. I tend to stick with the classics because they are timeless.
17. What do you do to prevent anger?
Um...actually I spur it on. I indulge it, allow it to grow and fester until I explode in total unadulterated RAGE!!! DIE TOM CRUISE!! DIE, YOU TALENTLESS PIECE OF ASS-LINT!!! Actually, I do breathing exercises and yoga.
18. Are you passive or aggressive?
Passive-aggressive. I try to avoid conflict at all costs. I will literally bend over and have someone screw me up the ass with a flashlight, figuratively speaking, before contradicting them. I also like to make people squirm, especially my brother.
19. Who is your idol?
Jesus Christ, the carpenter.
20. Who is your second family?
My graduate school buddies: Shagman, Mr. Picky, Giantsfan, Stretch, The Aussie, The Fast One, Caity-Bug. Love you guys!
21. Do you trust others easily?
Yes, unfortunately. "Born Sucker" shall be my epitaph.
22. What did you play with as a child?
No Barbie, no GI Joe, no Transformers, no Cabbage-Patch kids. No conventional toys for me. I played with empty perfume bottles, used pens, card board boxes and bubble rap. Bubble rap was my favorite. I once made stick figures out of paper clips and created my own football (soccer) team and we beat (West) Germany in the World Cup on my bed.
23. What class(es) during high school do you think was/were a waste of time?
Reading and Development - 20 kids sitting in a circle and whining about how their lives suck and the teacher telling them that they can do whatever they want and to follow their dreams but never giving them any insight as to how to proceed. Oh and kids, don't forget "Don't be a fool. Stay in School. Drugs aren't cool."
24. Do you like sappy love songs?
Yes, "Born Sucker, Born Sap" shall be my epitaph.
25. Have you ever been on radio or television?
I was on television once for like 0.5 seconds when Bruce Willis handed me a t-shirt at the opening of Planet Hollywoord in Houston. Then there was that Rocket's game where we got seats behind the visitors (Lakers) bench. Btw, Shaq has a big-ass head.
|
