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Spam is the new Keats
08.16.06 (4:27 pm)   [edit]
I swear, those monkeys with typewriters have finally banged out Shakespeare. Everyday I get spam that borders on interesting but it totally incoherent. Still, I find it oddly satisfying. Here for your reading pleasure, that is if you take pleasure on giving yourself a migraine, is the unedited email from "Long Cox and Bedfellow":

I dare you to stand where no man has had his pride and shovel in turn to the depths of the earth May you be encircled by vultures and your eyes pecked for everything is longer than expected but shorter than it should be You are a skunk of the worst kind and a mongrel eats just as well as a pedigree and you shall have your madam in her quarters but buttocks on high is not sharp to fit well with her and you ask too many questions of me When will we see the sunshine again, I asked with hope in my loins and so came the man and then the child and all was well until she came It is unfortunate that your face is not hidden from the prying eyes of the world for it is an unfortunate likeness of Babylon comes but twice a year and only you can prevent forest fires Shove off and die alone and you will know my pain my sorrow you squat and linger Debra do not chide her for she knows only of the low ways and the willow tree bathes her in sunlight and leaves to hollow the night and the wind rustles the leaves at dawn Do not run with scissors nor with pen to paper to hurt the soul that does not speak for itself and surely all lies will be told
 


posted by: drcrotch (reply)
post date: 08.16.06 (1:31 pm)

Only you can prevent forest fires. Shove off and die!

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